TEN THOUSAND TIMES

“I love you” –

I hear myself say,

Ten thousand times a day.

In my throat forms

This little knot of love,

Each time I watch you

Leaving, from above.

And I fall hard, for you,

I really, really do,

Ten thousand times a day,

Whether in November or in May.

Ten thousand times I inhale,

Your sweet, heady, male smell,

Caressing your clothes, kerchief,

Or your partly wet towel.

Ten thousand times

Your name I scream,

When, at dawn,

The stars grow dim.

In solitude, tension,

Anger or evasion,

I love you with

A steadfast passion.

And if I were to die tomorrow,

Surely, it won’t be from sorrow –

Dying for love’s a better way,

If I were to die some day.

Ten thousand times will I swear this,

And seal it with a tender kiss.

ELECTRICITY

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I gaze into your eyes

And read everything –

All that you can’t tell me,

All that stuff you’re feeling.

Trust me, I feel the same way;

But, like you, just cannot say.

We’re two lonely, silent souls;

The silence is just taking its toll.

Why must we fear love so?

Why can’t we just let go

Past pains and this loneliness,

Absence of hope and our distress?

Who knows if this love’s real?

Who cares whether we’re ideal?

So many doubts assail me;

Yet I can feel the electricity.

Our stupid, practical minds are fearful

But our hearts can feel each other’s pull.

Amazing, isn’t it, how every time

I claim your breaths, as you do mine?

How our bodies move in perfect sync?

How, when apart, we still share a link?

Whenever we meet, the sparks fly;

Yet we keep wondering – Why?

What say you that we give romance

And this electricity an honest chance?

Maybe it will light up our life

And help us through a sea of strife.

I’d so like us to grow old together

And be buried beneath a quilt of heather.

What is life if we do not dare

To live this love that is so rare?

 

MAGICAL

Tender is the night.

A cool breeze gently wipes

The clinging beads of sweat

Off the night’s tired brow.

You and I sit, lost in

The magic of the moment,

Under the dark boughs.

You stare into the distance

And I steal glances at you;

You think of far-off things

While I think of you.

The music flows into the fountain

And spreads across the garden,

Stirring the flowers in its wake;

Then it creeps up on you and me,

Connecting us, binding us tight,

Like a giant, mesmerizing snake.

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PAIN

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No, this wouldn’t do. She realized that day that she loved him far too much for her own good. Or for his, for that matter. Her love for him was a constant, acute sense of pain; when she was with him, it dulled to a throbbing sensation, but never quite went away. And when she wasn’t, it threatened to consume her. It filled her with fear – the fear that all that she held dear was going to fall apart some day; and all because when she loved, she loved fiercely. Her love was of a kind; it couldn’t be contained. She loved like her days were numbered and love was the only thing left for her to do (for everybody else had excelled at everything else)- before her lamp went out.

So, she made a decision. She needed to leave while she still mattered, while everything was still in place. She owed it to herself and to him. No matter what, he shouldn’t be hurt. If hurt, maybe just a little – something that time could erase; not destroyed by love. Love builds; it shouldn’t be given the power to destroy.

She left for the mountains, without a word to anyone. She hoped to find peace. And this she did find; though not quite in the usual way. The car she was travelling by was lost in a sudden landslide. Not a trace of her was ever found. It was as if she had never existed. But she had finally succeeded in putting an end to the pain caused by this love that consumed her – one way or the other.

ANOTHER CHANCE

Another chance is all I need

To make your heart skip a beat-

A timeless surrender to desire

To set the entire earth on fire.

Another chance is all I need

To make you truly mine for ever;

Another chance to forge a link

Between your water and my fire.

Another chance is all I need

To put to shame the summer’s heat,

When I hold you in my arms in June

Or in a bitterly cold December.

No other reason do I desire

To hold your hand and walk through fire;

For there is no greater power than

The match between water and fire.

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DESIRE

Burning Desire Waves

The moments crawl past

As darkness digs its claws in deeper;

Yet, I cannot slumber-

I’m enervated, tempted,

Tormented by desire.

I close my eyes to shut all out,

But find your face

Smiling coyly up at me;

The twinkle in your star-like eyes

Simply steal my breath, trust me!

I pass my fingers lightly over

The slightly disheveled bed-cover,

While the brown softness of your skin

Is what my fingers truly desire.

The smokey kohl in your love-lit eyes,

Those trembling lips under my fingers,

Your perfect dimples and raven curls-

Are enough to set my heart on fire.

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EVER SINCE

I’ve wanted to be with you

Ever since, ever since…

You ask, “Ever since when?”

I struggle to find an answer

And for a long time I wonder,

Was it since for ever

Or was it only since June?

I try hard to please you

But feel like a song out of tune.

I’ve wanted to hold you

Ever since, ever since…

And you ask again,

“Ever since when?”

Was it since I first saw you

Or was it since last April?

I try to tell you how I feel-

Yet, I act like a shy daffodil.

I can churn out words (in general)

Like artillery fire; 

But when you question me,

I feel so lost in desire-

As if I were stuck in a mire.

Some feelings are best left

Unexpressed; better still,

Just discern them, if you will.

LOVESONG

Don’t know how long

I’ve been waiting

For you. I remember

Several occasions

When my need was

Stronger than ever;

But especially, I

Remember one July

Afternoon, wet and cold,

When I, a gawky kid,

Fifteen years old,

Turned homeward,

Deliberately forgetting

Raincoat and umbrella,

Just to enjoy the rain.

I left school,

Soaked through,

And into the rain

I walked, searching

High and low, for you.

Oh, but, where were you?

I braved the storm;

Cascades of water, too,

That blurred my vision;

Even waded upstream

Through waist-high water

That transformed

Roads into rivers.

Oblivious of open drains

Or gaping manholes,

I pursued my way,

Expecting, at every turn,

Your strong arms

Or your warm bosom-

Oh where were you, then?

And how old?-

Sixteen, I should guess.

I miss you, now,

As I missed you, when

I was gawky and fifteen,

Frightened and wet!

Yet I love you, if

For no other reason,

But that I survived

Three heart-breaks and

Now, you’re heart-broken.

TRY, LOVE!

Please, try a little harder,

Try a little more-

To care for the Other,

To love like never before.

Try a little harder,

Pray, try a little more;

And I can promise that

Love will open newer doors.

Just try a little more, darling,

And try to care deeper;

And you’ll find this world of ours

Is a world without borders.

Try a little harder, please,

Now, won’t you, sweetie?

My heart’s an open book, my love,

Filled with beautiful reality.

Just try; and I’ll ask no more

Than for you to walk in

Through my humble door.

I’d ask you to sit down

And may be watch some golf;

Or share some senseless chit chat

O’er priceless mugs of coffee.

I might ask you to make love even

And never yell, “Back off!”

I’d find a million excuses

For us to be together;

All I want is you, my love,

In this world or the other.

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THE SHADOW

I am the shadow

That lurks around corners,

Just out of reach,

Just beyond the range

Of your sight.

In broad daylight,

Amidst a busy, faceless crowd

Catch, you might,

A momentary glimpse

Of me flitting,

In and out

Of the crowd

Like a vision in

A spring-flavored dream,

Borne away by the milieu,

Tearfully moving on.

I am your shadow,

The one that fazes you –

Sometimes you scream

And hastily beat

A confounded retreat,

When you fall into my arms

Upon turning a dark corner.

Among the multitudes of

Noisy, well-lit streets

You won’t find me;

But in the darkest hour,

Lightless and silent,

Save for the pale glow

Of my candle and the wax

Dripping into the gloom below,

When all you grab is emptiness

And you are afraid of a fall,

I keep you company.

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